Cadbury Dairy Milk Simply the Zest

How boring would you consider a Dairy Milk bar to be on a scale of one to ten? I’d suggest somewhere in the high hundreds.

Various bits of organic matter and anything the cooks can dig out of the ground or pick off the floor are usually thrown into a chocolate batch and called “original” or “creative”. In reality, the result is usually just green covered in brown.

This year – being unable to rely on any of their own blue sky thinkers – Cadbury pleaded for members of the public to submit their barmy brainstorms in a national competition.

Rather predictably, the results were less barmy and more balmy. Out of a pool of 65 million possible options, all that Cadbury could produce was Raspberry Shortcake, Choca-Latte (coffee) and Simply the Zest (orange).

Good job we don’t have to rely on Cadbury for medical research or space travel.

Or me, for that matter. The competition ended about thirty years ago, but now is the exact moment to review Simply the Zest (although, to be fair, they’ll probably be on sale in Poundland for the next century).

It’s got a rubbish name, let’s face it. It’s a pun that a four year old could have thought of during an ad break. Maybe that’s who its target audience is?

Which would explain why I quite like it.

Having tried the Raspberry Shortcake, I was rather cynical that the orange version was going to be any better.

Surprisingly though, it was zesty. There were small orange crystals scattered throughout each chunk of chocolate that genuinely generated a powerful orangey taste. These mixed superbly with small pieces of caramel that really did melt in the mouth and produce a salty yet creamy sensation.

Exactly where the almonds (as described on the packaging) were, however, was difficult to work out. Similarly, although there was a crunchy aspect which was presumably the digestive biscuit, there was no precise taste that suggested what it could have been. Maybe it was gravel or crocodile skin.

A further upside is that the bar was a good size that didn’t leave me wanting, as is typical of Cadbury products. The trusted Home Bargains shopping experience only charged me one pound for the pleasure, too.

Simply the Zest is not simply the best; it is, however, an enjoyable chocolate bar that should stand out as a Cadbury classic. It doesn’t have the guts to match up to more ambitious rivals, but perhaps it does give emphasis to the theory of “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”.

4* out of 5.

By JAMES LEWIS
Wanderer, wonderer and editor of the Chocolate Dissection blog (which will ideally melt hearts rather than brains). Reliable with sarcasm, less so with a scalpel. Twitter: @IdeasJimbound


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